Postcards
by Accio-Underwear
Summary: ONESHOT A half an hour before passing, he was confronted by Eric Cartman with the proposition of making the Fourth a bit more interesting this year. Slight K/K


_Disclaimer – I do not own South Park_

_Okay, one day I was just riding the bus and a thought hit me. If Kenny materializes back to life like in 'Cartman's Mom is Still a Dirty Slut' all the time, why not make it interesting?_

_It's so random and crappy! lol_

* * *

**July 4 **

Sixteen year old Kenny McCormick is killed a rather festive death which included a parade float, fireworks and Eric Cartman.

Three hours before his passing, he admitted his crush on Kyle Broflovski.

Two hours before his passing, he was moping in the back of his father's pickup.

One hour before his passing, he was intensely making out with Kyle Broflovski.

A half an hour before passing, he was confronted by Eric Cartman with the proposition of making the Fourth a bit more interesting this year.

**August 4**

Kenny has yet to come back from the dead.

His friends worry.

**September 1**

Kyle Broflovski receives a postcard in the mail. The photo is of the Leaning Tower of Pisa. Kenny McCormick is also in the picture, casually posing to make the picture look as though he were leaning against the tower and grinning at the camera.

On the back of the card is the blonde's chicken scratch.

_Europe is fucking awesome dude. You should go sometime. I'll be back soon. _

_Love Kenny_

**September 2**

Still perplexed as to why Kenny is in Europe and not South Park, Kyle shows the postcard to Stan Marsh and Eric Cartman. Just as perplexed, and fucking annoyed that Kenny didn't invite them or send them a card, the boys opt to show the McCormick family and ease their troubles.

Carol McCormick ends up showing the boys two previous postcards from Kenny McCormick. One was of him in front of the remains of the Berlin Wall and the other of him riding a bike along a street in Amsterdam.

The first said:

_Sorry if I'm worrying you, Mom. I got a little side-tracked. I'll bring you a souvenier for when I get back. Say 'hi' to Dad and Karen. Ground Kevin for me._

_Love, Kenny_

The second said:

_I died and lost your gift. Sorry. I'll make it up to you. Say 'hi' to Dad and Karen. Ground Kevin for me._

_Love, Kenny_

**September 27**

School had long started and still no sign of Kenny. This time, Stan Marsh receives a post card. The photo is of how amazed Kenny is at the size of a baguette in front of the Eiffel Tower.

_Holy shit, dude. French people fucking love me. I gained like five pounds from free food. By the way, did you know they eat SNAILS here? It's actually not that bad. Frog legs on the other hand…_

_Stay cool and take notes for me,_

_Kenny_

**October 13**

The next postcard was received by Eric Cartman. This time Kenny was in Spain, drinking and relaxing on a nude beach. Thankfully for the receiver, the blonde put a towel over his lap for the photo.

_I'm getting an all around tan. And, dude, if I wasn't totally for Kyle, I'd totally be in the middle of that pile of naked woman. Too bad you're not here, sucker. _

_Thanks for the free trip,_

_Kenny_

Eric Cartman cussed the blonde and tossed the postcard in the trash. Kyle Broflovski rescued it soon after.

**October 31**

Kyle Broflovski, Eric Cartman and Stan Marsh sat on the cold curb by Kyle's mailbox, hoping that they'd receive a post card from Kenny McCormick. They were also bored as hell and too old to celebrate Halloween.

Cussing and a fight between Kyle and Eric broke out, causing Stan to sigh and shake his head. They immediately went silent when the postman approached them, looking perplexed.

"This is for you." He stated before handing the card to Kyle and wandering off in confusion.

The boys quickly looked at the picture, fairly confused at the fact that it was them, just about to sit on the curb only taken about an hour ago, when Eric Cartman still had the burrito he picked up before joining his friends. They flipped over the card to read Kenny McCormick's chicken scratch.

_Look up._

As soon as the three boys registered Kenny's presence, there was shouting andhugging (and intense kissing on Kyle's part).

Then a truck ran over and flattened Kenny McCormick.


End file.
